***BZZT BZZT*** THIS IS HUBERT DO YOU READ ME ***BZZT BZZT***
***BZZT*** YES HUBERT! LOUD AND CLEAR ***BZZT***
Today is my birthday! Yes; 17 years ago today (precisely 7:47 AM), I was thrown out of my mother's vagina!
Speaking of vaginas, I don't have a girlfriend yet, so no intercourse for me yet. I'm available, hotties. ;) Of course, I don't *need* to have a girlfriend to get laid, but it helps.
Best regards to everyone on this bittersweet day, except for jerk-jocks. You suck, I'll have you know.
***BZZT BZZT*** HUBERT WILLIS OUT ***BZZT BZZT***